Farewell to Bush

As much as I wish I was clever or politically savvy enough to be writing some eloquent banter about the big adios to George W Bush, this is nothing along those lines.

Recently I was doing a shoot and upon wrapping the crew and I along with the agency folks posted up in a small saloon style dive bar and spent the night playing pool and telling each other how awesome we all thought we were. Anecdotes flowed freely as did the whiskey. You know, typical wrap party please God let me charm them into hiring me again type shit.

Once the booze was thoroughly raping our systems and we had all but lost our sense of "self edit" the conversation of course turned to the subject of sex, blow jobs, facials, the "Hot Carl" and other sticky situations. Among our troupe was one creative who made a bold statement that she was "Totally over the shaving of the bush" Silence. Excuse me? I said. You have got to be fucking kidding me. Like most era's, fads come and go and with the 1970's was the full bush. As in the words of my charming uncle Alec; "I think I just threw up in my mouth"

As a man I can only sympathize with women of the world in this day and age with the levels of maintenance that must occur on a daily basis, but to leave the bush? You're high. Even men "Manscape" these days as per request of so many women. "If I've gotta do it, so do you" Fair enough.

I have to say with respect she stood her ground. She fought for her new found constitution. I sat quietly in the corner listening to her justifications ( a rarity for me ) until she finally ended her momentary lapse of reason with " Hey, there's still a pussy in there" where upon I chimed in with a retort " Well i'm sure there is a cure for cancer somewhere in a Brazilian rain forest but that doesn't mean I am going to search for that either"

Nuff said.

A final thought. I don't know how many of you have ever had the terrible misfortune of having a kernel shell of popcorn stuck in your throat let alone a moment of aural contemplation with a 1977 feminist, but it my mind I imagine that they both... suck.

Still... I do feel bad for the women who subject themselves to the levels of eradicating hair from their bodies.

Visit Brazil!

Clark and Michael

This is pretty much my new favorite website. If Arrested Development was a fav of yours then I think you will agree that Clark and Michael is definitely the best show not on TV. Blog entries, profiles, photo diaries, and best of all... EPISODES! Mostly of nothing much other than Clark Duke and Michael Cera doing nothing much of anything. But it is perfect.

I'm not gonna lie. I love Michael Cera. Not in a I want to teabag him sort of way. More of a I just really laugh every time I watch him speak kind of way. I don't know much about Clark yet but so far he is right up there with my viewing enjoyment of watching young akward actors playing young akward actors acting.

Check out thier website / blog whateveryoucallit and have a laugh.

Clark and Michael

Radiohead at the Holywood Bowl

Seeing any show at the Hollywood Bowl is quite a thing. Outdoors with perfect sound and a cool evening breeze. Not to mention if you have good enough seats ( something we were fortunate enough to have) you can have someone bring you overpriced booze. And even better if you are more prepared you can bring a picnic basket with your own wine and treats to last you throughout the show.

I managed to sneak my sweet G9 digi cam into the show to grab some sneaky shots of the amazing light show that accompanied the bands talents. Something that I have to say that even if you are not much of a fan of Radiohead, the lights make it enjoyable none the less.

The opening band however was pure shite. Nothing more than a noise machine. Hell, I would have rather heard the Miami Sound Machine. They might as well have been called Cat in a trash can. Mainly because that is about what they sounded like.

As always shows at the Bowl are full of famous people. Here are some people who were sitting around us that we saw.

Tim Roth
Michael C. Hall ( of Dexter and Six Feet Under)
Seth Green
Beck
and some super hot chick from some movie that I can't quite place.

I have to say that it was a great show. Even Stacey, who by the way is not incredibly into Radiohead, enjoyed the show. Here are some colorful pics of the night.

Backin Beckinsale's backside

Like many couples my wife and I started posing that question of the "free pass". Or to be more specific, what famous person would you fuck if you had the chance and I gave you my ok to do so? Well it didn't take me long to divulge my choice. Kate Beckinsale does it for me. Princess on the streets.. well, you know the rest. At least that is what she is like in my fantasy. I think my wife picked someone weird and hairy but I can't remember who. It kind of got me thinking... am I weird and hairy?

Regardless I think it is safe to say that I am not alone in my Iwouldfuckkatebeckinsaleinanewyorkminute sentiment.

I feel much better getting that off my chest.

iPod venderiffic!

I just found this out and thought it was so amazingly cool that I had to share. While traveling through JFK airport you might stumble upon this vending machine which conveniently sells iPods, PSP,s Airport Express and many other candied items for the electronic buff. It is all so Japan style it ain't even funny.

UGGly boots

First off I have to be honest and up front in saying that in the early 90's I was a sponsored snowboarder with moderate fame. Secondly I have to be honest in saying that one of my sponsors that actually paid me for two years was unfortunately the one and only UGG Boot company. At the time it seemed like a not so bad situation as UGG boots were still a bit of a surf culture novelty. As I was a Canadian kid being associated to anything surf-ish was really cool so signing on with the Sheepskin footwear company was A-ok.

Fast forward to 2002. I am walking along some street in LA and I see some really hot girl wearing UGG boots, a denim mini skirt and a t shirt. First off I thought Holy shit! I would give a pinky toe to have a 1/2 hour with her right after she pounded three Margaritas and thought every word that came out of my mouth was the funniest and most clever things she had ever heard. And then I panned down to see what was wrapped around her feet. UGG boots?? Are you effin kidding me? Who in their right mind would think those are anything other than something to keep your feet from freezing after you get out of the chilly Pacific waters aprés surf? A fashion statement? Fuck me.

I somehow feel slightly responsible for this social blunder. And now I see lemmings of all shapes and sizes still wearing these things as if they are the coolest thing at Barny's. Is it just me or like all the Jesus freaks are these people just suffering from mass delusion? It just makes me want to say Ewe.

Needless to say even though the sheepskin trend is a fashion blunder, I gotta admit that if you throw a pair of these on a half naked goddess I seem to be like most males and simply shoose to ignore it and move on.

Your fish smells like pussy

Most would think that catching a fish in the middle of a city would be nasty nasty. not true! While on a trip to Calgary we went camping with the inlaws. upon reaching the end of the trip I stayed a little longer to do a little solomenté fly fishing with a friend. Hmmm, I guess this would make it anything but Solomenté right? One of my oldest and most favorite streams to fish in while back in the great white north is the Elbow River that happens to run straight through the middle of the city of Calgary. If someone ever told me that you could catch Browns the length of your arm in a river that has homeless sleeping next to it I would tell them they have been huffing glue.

Beachy beacherson

When you look at a redhead you tend not to think "man I bet he would look great at the beach". An instant visual of pasty pink flesh cooking in the California sun has the ability to make even the most strong of stomached people want to throw up in their mouth.

On that note I decided to go with the shot of my wife's sweet body glistening in the Malibu sun rather than my freckled hide. You can thank me later.

Wasted Youth

I miss being young. Not a care in the world. Spending days on the beach with pretty girls getting wasted on cheap beer and hoping that some hottie would escape all common sense and convince herself that sleeping with me would be a good idea.

4th of July I spent the day on the beach with Stacey and a couple of friends when a group of extremely loud 18-20 year olds posted up next to us. Normally one might not enjoy this intrusion, however I absolutely loved it. These kids were loud, fun, and totally into having their photos taken. It was perfect.